I ‘F19’ got upset with my bf ‘M18’ because him and his gay girl bsf ‘F19’ are “affectionate” with eachother?
My(19f) boyfriend(18m) has a long time best friend (19f) who is a lesbian. They went to highschool together and got pretty close but they are mostly online friends now that we’re all in college. I met my boyfriend in college so I have never met her other than telling him to text her hi or seeing them text when we’re together. The very first time they hung out was a few months ago in December and I remember being happy for him but his phone was turned off the whole time due to an issue with it so it made me a little anxious. Fast forward to earlier today when me and my boyfriend have recently moved in together and his friend was planning on visiting and staying for a weekend. I was looking at his texts with her about the days because he had shown me them and she had just then texted him “can we cuddle?”. I was very weirded out about this because I had thought that was a very odd thing to say. I took some time to think about it but after I awhile I brought up how I could go home if they wanted space and to be fair it came off more aggressive than I had meant to be. He had responded with why do you think that text was so weird because she is a lesbian. I had asked them if they had cuddled before and he had said no but she is an affectionate person and they had been affectionate before. When I had asked him to tell me what he meant he told me that they had “held” each other when they were out one time and she had basically snuggled under his arm and onto his chest. I was trying to explain how I understand that she is gay and is not attracted to him but that it was not about that it was about the intimacy level that made me so uncomfortable. He was very upset and frustrated with me and it had turned into a very heated argument where I had said, “I just feel kinda cheated on” which right after I said that I went “that is really dramatic I’m sorry”. But it was just a very raw and frustrating moment because he was not listening to me. I feel really guilty for even bringing up it upset me now and like I’m super overreacting because now he doesn’t even want her to come visit and says even if she does he’ll feel guilty the whole time about it. He did end the conversation with they were cut the close contact even if he didn’t want to or understand why I was so weirded out about it. We had kinda made up and tried to go to bed and I took my usual position cuddled up under his arm and onto his chest but after he fell asleep I rolled over because all I could think about was his friend doing the exact same thing.