u/Competitive_Wash_459

For those who moved onto using donor eggs, can you please shed light on what the process entailed/was like as this feels very overwhelming from a cursory internet search. There seems to be endless websites, some look better than others. This seems harder than finding a surrogate.

1. Did you use a reputable agency to help you and if so, which one?
2. Who helped you navigate the health/genetic compatibility between donor and sperm that was being used? Was it your clinic? This is the most important thing to me.
3. Fresh eggs vs frozen. I know fresh leads to more possible embryos but I only want one child so I don't think I need to go the fresh route (I don't want an excess of extra embryos I have no intention of transferring). What was recommended to you? I also cannot fully grasp the idea yet of paying a young woman to go through egg retrieval just for me. I feel like I want some detachment to this person by purchasing what is already on ice in storage---if that makes sense.
4. Did you choose no contact with the donor or disclosure/communication and why?
5. Did it matter to you if the donor had previous live births with her donated eggs? Did you inquire how many other babies were born from them?
6. Have any of you decided to not tell close family and friends even when the child is born? I know honesty is always the best policy but this is so damn personal and sadly I do feel like a failure.

I am really struggling with this situation right now. I know so many of you amazing women have been here and I applaud and admire how you navigated all of this and that's why I turn to you for advice.

Thank you in advance.