u/Competitive_Pen_2481 — reddlx

How do I help support my detrans friend?

I have a friend who is struggling with his transition (Male > Female > Male). Lets call him Alan.

Alan started his transition around 14 years old but now regrets it deeply and is trying to return to being a man now at 21.

He said he felt like he was coerced into his transition by his mother and her friends but after all of the hormones and minor surgeries he is so regretful and angry. He says his biggest struggle now is that he doesn't even know how to be "A Man" now, that his whole upbringing robbed him of becoming a man and now hes not accepted anywhere. Alan is off all the medications now and is taking steps towards readjusting back to masculinity but its hard and everyone in our small town knows (everyone is pretty conservative here)

I'm a cis-man that's from a conservative area (guess I'm pretty conservative too in some ways) so I understand a bit what he means about "Being a Man" in the traditional sense but I have no idea what to say or how to support.

I've tried including him in my "guy" activities. I'm a pretty typical guy that enjoys shooting guns and going mudding and fishing and Alan loves to be included. But I feel like hes sitting on a wire and needs more than what I'm currently doing.

What would you do?

Note: He gave me permission to post this as long as identifying info is left out.