I (22F) did not want this marriage to go through so I would have expected to be more relieved now that it’s over but I’m actually a mess it turns out 🙃. I’d known about her fiancées gambling addiction and previous struggles with alcoholism and drug use, but I didn’t realize that he was actively addicted to cocaine. It puts the verbal abuse from my mom into more context, but I didn’t realize this so I would get on my mom for insulting him.
I feel way too sensitive and selfish that I’m even feeling this way, and I’ve been keeping it in for the most part but I broke down when I walked through the door at work today. I feel shameful and helpless and I don’t know why I’m always so sensitive about things. My depression has spiked significantly in these last couple days and I just hate myself right now ugh