Me (14F) and my brother (18M) are dealing with family infidelity, verbal abuse, and concern about our own future.
Throwaway account. Don't know when I'll come back to this.
I’m a 14-year-old girl living in a high-pressure environment, and I’m currently at a breaking point. Recently, it was discovered that my mother has been unfaithful. This has completely upended our home life. My father is a loyal, successful man, and I’m struggling to understand how this could happen to our family.
Since the confrontation, the atmosphere has turned toxic. My mother has resorted to extreme verbal abuse (including profanity and curses in the regional language). My father naturally reacted back with some profanity (definitely not as intense) and has physically lashed out, leaving permanent emotional and physical scars. Because of the stigma surrounding divorce in Indian culture and the fear of "snake-like" relatives judging us, my father wants to stay together "for the kids." Honestly, the idea of having no mother figure at all terrifies me, even though the current situation is traumatic. Although I know divorce is the best option for all of us, it doesn't seem to be the most sensible option considering they are growing old as well and I guess its not accepted in Indian culture generally.
I’ve noticed I & my brother are starting to mirror the anger I see at home. I’m ambitious: I’m aiming for the top academic rank in my state, I’m a Bharatanatyam dancer, competitive flutist, keyboardist, violinist and harmoniumist, artist. I also journal, read books, learn multiple languages but I find myself and my brother losing control and using the same harsh words my parents use when I’m angry.
How do I protect my and my brother's mental health and maintain my focus on my goals while living in a "broken" home? How do I stop myself from becoming the version of my parents that I currently resent? I want to be a better person, but I feel like I'm drowning in my family's choices.