What do i do with my life?
I am still pretty young, i’m 17 years old and my social life is pretty much non existent. I see all these people my age being able to go out to parties, out with their friends, having fun. I have none of that, i feel isolated, alone and i hate this feeling. I always ask myself, “why me?”
My life has been going downhill for a while now, i had a lot of things happen at home with my family, causing me to move out and live with my boyfriend. I have him, but he has his own friends, his own life. I don’t, i just feel constantly alone.
I am also meant to be in my first year of college but due to mental health struggles and no motivation i dropped out about half way through. Yeah, i’m mad at myself for giving up so quickly, but i couldn’t deal with the pressure from the teachers telling me that i’m not doing enough every single day when i was just trying my best to even get myself out of bed that day. I also couldn’t make any friends, it felt like i didn’t belong, nobody wanted me there. I was alone and spent my frees and lunches locked in a bathroom stall. I am going to attempt to rejoin a new college in September, but that comes with an extra year. Will i struggle to make friends since i’ll be in a class with everybody else younger?
I also wish i had the life that other people my age have, you see them learning how to drive, going out enjoying their lives and there’s nothing good to mine.
I have tried to get a job, but it’s hard in this day, every place says that they’ll get back to me (they never do) or just that they aren’t looking for anyone new at the moment in time.
I think the moral of the story is that i am just really struggling with feeling lonely and i really don’t know what to do with myself anymore.