AIO- breaking up with my boyfriend because he doesn’t like traditional women
Sorry for the long post
I feel shallow for thinking about breaking up with my boyfriend. I play a very traditional role in my relationship. I do the cleaning, shopping, meal planning, almost all the cooking. I cook a lot of our meals from scratch. I love doing these things but I feel unappreciated. I work full time and I’m in school. He’s 23 and I’m 27. I have hobbies like working with horses and gardening. I still work in the food industry to keep myself afloat but I wish I didn’t have to. My boyfriend is in school getting his masters. He works but not as much as me. Which is understandable. His education should be first and getting a new job is hard right now
But it’s the classic, he doesn’t help out. He is always asking, “what do you want me to do?” Why do I have to ask for help all the time:/ I’ve already talked with him about this multiple times. Nothing really changes. He just says I didn’t ask you to cook or clean.
He also has very little drive to want more. I want him to have a better job to help more with expenses. He doesn’t have to pay rent bc his parents help him. I have zero family. No one. No one can help me when things get tough. Sometimes things get hard and I want to be able to fall back on him a little bit. I take good care of myself, I’m clean. I have to remind him to brush his teeth before bed and ask him to stop farting 24/7. He’s gained weight this last year. I try to motivate him to eat healthier and work out but he won’t budge. He will also complain about not being as in shape as he used to be.
I would say that I am dependent. Lots of women my age tell me how bad it is that I baby my boyfriend. My love language is taking care of the people I love but his is to buy me things I don’t need. I want financial security in our relationship but I feel like I’m asking for too much. Is that unrealistic?
On the other side, he’s a big sweetheart. He loves me. He’s very loyal and his family loves me too and I love them. I’m very attached and clingy and he’s the same way. I don’t have to worry about him fooling around with someone else. which is actually so hard to find these days. He’s very honest with me too. I feel so conflicted. I try to be self aware. Is this more of a me issue?
Sorry if this is all over the place.