u/Choose_Joy1 — reddlx

Hey you,

I want to let you in on my thoughts. Hopefully it all makes sense. Where do I even start?

My job? Absolutely terrible. I have no idea what I am supposed to do. I am turning 30 this year and feel completely stuck. I have also been single for a year now and time is flying there too. My car is in the shop again and I am moving in three months.

On top of that there is this strong desire to travel alone but at the same time there is pressure to find someone, get married and have kids. Time is running.

I want to stay consistent with sport and focus on my mental health while ideally not neglecting my friends and family.

Right now my life feels like a constant up and down. In the past two weeks I have had two dates for the first time in many many years and I am realizing that my energy just is not enough to really get to know someone properly. Not to mention I do not want to force myself.

And to top it all off I still have feelings for a certain person I think I have not seen in two years. That makes everything even harder. I do not want to meet someone just to distract myself.

So yes and then people wonder why I cannot fall asleep at night.

-me