Father is in hospital-last thing he told me was to never call him again
For some context, my dad and I have always had a very rocky relationship. I witnessed him physically abuse my mother and his second wife as a child and it wrecked my psyche. I was put into therapy around five years old because I was literally terrified of the men in my life.
A few months ago I reached out around my birthday and he basically told me to never call him again which is funny because he’s literally begged me to call him my whole life but Trump has literally rearranged his brain into thinking I’m a “liberal dirtbag” and he hates me.
Anyways, I was just informed that he’s in the hospital with a very serious condition that he should have died from days ago but somehow (probably out of spite) he’s hanging on.
My question is, why the fuck do I care?! He has literally told me to fuck off. I’ve told him to fuck off but his last words to me being “don’t call me again” has me all sorts of fucked up. That was supposed to be my line.
Any advice? I called the hospital and they won’t talk to me obviously because I’m not his emergency contact. They told me he’s stable but I know nothing else.
Why does this fucker still have a hold over me when I’m so much happier without him in my life?!