u/CheesecakeOdd3075

Im one of the technical employees that got placed on a team with more manual workers, and historically my role is more independent of meetings and more "just assign the ticket to me, attach the proper screenshots/videos, and Ill let you know if I have any questions." Since this team has no formal experience with someone whose role works independently like mine, I have no dog in this fight to insist that I dont need to be in every meeting.

HOWEVER. I got placed on a project and now working with an overachieving coworker who insists on booking constant meetings for everything and roping in our eagle-eye but spread thin manager (who would leave me alone otherwise).

The issue is that I cant just ask for "more space" or "less meetings" or just set any sort of boundaries, nor can I explain to this team that my role is more independent of meetings, because we are hand-and-foot to this client and if that means my coworker adding more meetings to my workweek to propose some other bullshit busy work to add to the meeting, then I have to attend it.

All of this has me so bittersweetly reminiscing on how one of my highest paying jobs where I put out my best work, with the best team, manager and work-life balance was somehow the job that had the least amount of meetings. Its hilariously fucking ironic.

How can I propose independence to random meetings? Its gotten under my fucking skin to the point where if Im 1 or 2 minutes behind to one of these random meetings, I get pinged incessantly, which was the tipping point for me posting this haha.

I have been reflecting over the last two years on and off about my relationships with men (both intimately, as friends, and as acquaintances) and how aging has now cast a stronger, very, very shittier light on them once I had kind of had the realization that an alarming amount of men, whether they choose to acknowledge it or not, are misogynistic.

There was no switch that flipped, but I eventually came to the conclusion in my late 20s that I was definitely demisexual, and that I required trust with men, but even with some men that I had come to trust, once they got comfortable with me....the deeply unsettling remarks they would make about women seemed to attack in a way I didnt really understand until now.

When a woman is doing well for themselves, is loved or cared for, attractive, popular, well received, intelligent, literally anything or any combination of sorts, I noticed how the jabs about the woman in question would be talked about in a way that makes my skin crawl. Aside from the classic "she sleeps around" bullshit, it would be this weird, almost defensive deep jabs as if their feeling emasculated..... stuff like "She got the job because she's hot/has big tits," "she only does _____ because its cool", "she's only a harvard grad because shes a trust fund baby," "she had a good family life growing up because shes a rich kid"..... just the most stupid, low blow crybaby bullshit that I dont ever think about with EITHER gender. It’s just this deep, sickening scorn and jealousy that seems to come from this almost primitive place that’s quite honestly fucking terrifying.

Seeing how hypersensitive men are about being emasculated, their worth questioned, their status or their attention taken from them almost sends them into a state of strange frenzy, almost a weird compulsion to justify why a female can have something good happen to them, especially if its not the norm. Im just sitting there like.... dude how long has this been living rent free in your head? I sincerely dont think about most people, men or women, that deeply because I have way too much shit going on in my life -- how have you not figured out that what you're saying is actively scaring women away!?!

For the last 32 years of my life, it has been overwhelmingly "fuck her" instead of "good for her".

So nowadays, with men, Its almost as if my body cant relax and Im waiting for a man's response to women or how he treats them, the women in his own life, or how he talks about them, in order for me to finally relax or feel safe. It feels as if my trust has inherently worsened with a large portion of them.

What makes me feel even MORE sick is the women that date these chuds, listen to their shitty little remarks about what they have to say about other women, and go along with it instead of leaving them in the dust. I wish I could shake them out of it and install higher self esteem into their brains so they can leave them.

I do appreciate the men that I feel safe around and champion in the women in their lives through action and not just words, and at this point I think that this is just where Im at with men I guess.

For those of you that resonate with this, was there a catalyst moment for you as well?

Sorry for my limited knowledge as I had just moved here. I noticed the only comprehensive art supply store is Jerry's on the north side.

When I say comprehensive Im talking very specific art supplies that typical big box stores don't typically carry, but smaller stores or even a Blick will carry.

Not that Im complaining about having Jerry's, but I am a little surprised that its the only one and its quite the drive from my side of the city.

Unless Im missing something. Please advise.

looking for a bar with enough indoor/outdoor seating where you can post up and draw, do a crossword, etc. just solo activities with enough cozy corners to chill in for a few hours and be left alone

ETA: central, south or east side.

reading is not necessary per se, but maybe a bar with enough indoor/outdoor seating where you can post up and draw, do a crossword, etc. just solo activities with enough cozy corners

I 32f have spent the last 6-8 months finding myself deeply struggling with lack of discipline, seemingly out of nowhere.

I know I am not depressed, I am in therapy, things in life are actually going really well and there’s a ton of exciting things to look forward to.

Im aware of my ADHD (can’t take medication or stimulants for it, tried everything) and it’s issues, but even whenever I wasn’t medicated, I was still able to ride the dopamine highs and get at least one cool thing done that day. nowadays I have ZERO creativity, just boredom and doomscrolling every day.

I run every day, take multiple vitamins, been eating healthier than I ever have, and have since been really upping my water intake. My labs recently all came back normal, actually better than they have been.

I work from home 4 days out of the week. these last several weeks have been so chill and nothing bad to report.

what happens is that i will wake up around 8-9am like I normally do, and seemingly spend the entire 10-12 hours of the day just mindlessly zoning out, scrolling on my phone, going on my run, make lunch, work, texting friends, then boom, before I know it it’s nightfall and I rinse repeat for 4 days straight.

Im severely lacking motivation, discipline and structure in my day and my brain is having a deeply difficult time trying to figure out why this is happening. my days just sort of keep going to waste and it’s starting to make me upset and also cause issues with work as well.

did you try something that worked or did not work for you?

please share.

Current routine:

AM:
- Vanicream gentle facewash or plain water depending when in cycle
- AA 15%
- LRP 60 spf

PM:
- Vanicream gentle facewash
- AA 15% on non tret days OR .045 Arazlo on my tret day
- 100% jojoba oil if need be

My skin has been adjusting very nicely so far, but Im still battling annoying texture mainly on my T Zone.
Ive had great experience with Glyc acid. I'd maybe consider paula's choice BHA. But idk.

So two questions:

1. Im really wanting to reincorporate Glycolic acid (I have TO 10% Glyc Acid), can I just use it 1-2x a week on a non tret night?
2. Can I use my AA 15% twice a day, every day, including on tret days?
3. I'd prolly skip the AA on my glyc nights.