AITA for wanting to break up with my boyfriend because he disappears for 2–3 days after work?
I 20F have been dating my boyfriend 23M for 5 years now. He works as a mechanic, and I understand his job can be exhausting, but lately there’s been an issue that’s making me seriously reconsider the relationship.
This only started happening this year. Before that, things felt normal and we didn’t really have issues like this, which is part of why I’m so confused and hurt by the sudden change.
Sometimes after work, he just doesn’t come home for 2–3 days. During that time, communication is either very limited or nonexistent. I’ll text or call to make sure he’s okay and ask where he is, and most of the time I either get ignored or get a short response hours later.
What hurts the most is that he acts like this is completely normal and says I’m overreacting for being upset about it. I’m not asking him to constantly update me or ask permission to go out, but disappearing for days at a time while in a relationship feels disrespectful and inconsiderate to me.
I’ve tried talking to him about how much it bothers me, and he usually says he’s tired, with friends, needed space, or lost track of time. But I feel like if someone genuinely cares about you, it shouldn’t be hard to send a quick text or communicate that they won’t be home.
At this point, I feel anxious every time he gets off work because I never know if I’ll actually hear from him or see him that night. Part of me feels guilty for wanting to break up over this because he says I’m making it a bigger issue than it is, but another part of me feels like this isn’t how a healthy relationship should work.
AITA for wanting to end the relationship over this?