WIBTAH If I Disown My Parents
So my mom (F 69) is probably an undiagnosed narcissist. She has always had this unreasonable idea that I (F 32) should be this perfect little doll, whether it be barefoot and pregnant and subservient to a husband or working 50+ hours a week like she did. The way she talks to me is condescending and always accuses me of being off my meds every time I get upset with her over one thing or another. Today I tried to explain to her how Nintendo Switch stuff works because she has rewards perks at BestBuy and I'm trying to convince her into helping me get a Switch 2. She went on a tyrade on how she hates that I'm paying for cloud storage and that Nintendo is a rip off. (Ngl she is kinda right in that part.) And I've explained to her that if I get a Switch 2 I need to make sure my data is transferred over correctly or I will lose 6 years of save data. Should've been the end of the convo. Instead she goes on another tyrade on how I shouldn't be playing video games and that "nobody my age plays video games". This isn't the first time she has done stuff like this and has implied even worse stuff about me about other issues, like she wants me to stop going to therapy for ongoing mental health issues. I've had one foot out the door on my relationship with her for years. Dad (M 70) hates video games even more and backs her up. He's also a functioning alcoholic who told me I wasn't his daughter anymore in a fit of rage over something unrelated several months before this incident with my mom. I still can't get his words out of my head even after he apologized and said he didn't mean it. I've had enough of their bs. It really sounds like I'm going to disown them over a Nintendo Switch 2, but like I said this isn't the first incident and it certainly won't be the last. WIBTAH If I walk away from both relationships at this point? I've had enough.
Update: Hi. So, it's the next day and I realize how my post sounds, but I'm not taking it down. I do want to clear up some things though to address comments as a whole instead of individually. I shouldn't have to justify myself to anyone, but here we are.
1- To the Reddit doctors who keep diagnosing me as having NPD, feel free to post your medical degrees in the comments. (Note the sarcasm.) I've been in the mental health system for 17 years and not a single therapist or psychiatrist has even mentioned NPD to me or even suggested it. I have stated that I have BPD and am now disclosing that I am neurospicy, and that's all I'm going to disclose. Neither are an excuse for said behavior, but they offer context. There are others, many others, but nobody here is entitled to my entire medical history. You're free to judge whatever you think I may or may not have, but I know what I have and my doctors know what I have. There are many other factors that I have not disclosed in my post that I'm not going to disclose in an update. Respect my privacy. To also clarify, my therapist is the one that has suggested my mom has undagnosed narcissism, and quite frankly I agree with her.
2- My mom has offered to me several times to use her BB perks, such as BB points and GeekSquad services because she pays for them and doesn't use them very often. Hence why I have been negotiating with her for over a month to help me finance said console: so she could use her BB points so they don't expire and so I could get a better price by trading in my old one for the new one and have GeekSquad transfer my data over. This is a mutually beneficial situation for both of us. But, when I tried to explain how Nintendo Online cloud storage works and that i was paying for it, that is what set her off. However, she also judges everything I have ever spent money on, even if it's with my own money, down to the penny. Even if it's not expensive, if she deems whatever it may be "worthless", she'll make her opinion known. From where I buy groceries and gas to paying to play DND every month at a local game shop.
3- You're defending a woman who has threatened to commit a hate crime before. Last year, I had a friend (30's MtF) stay with me because she was disowned by her mom for coming out as trans. So I took her in for a little while until she found an apartment for her and her polycule. Somehow, my mom found out and threatened my care coordinator that she was going to drive from several states away where she lives, show up at my apartment unannounced, and forcefully remove her from my home. She then proceeded to shun me for the next two months when I told her that if she did show up I was going to have the landlord trespass her and have the police notified. And once said friend finally found an apartment two months later, she started talking to me and being nice to me again. She also claims that she was "just trying to protect me". Said friend has also told me several times I should disown my parents because she knows a fuller extent of what my mom has done in the past and my dad after the "you're not my daughter anymore" comment. (Said friend also owes me money and won't pay me back when I've asked her several times to do so. So she's on thin ice too.)
4- At least I don't watch a certain dubious news station every day as a "hobby" like my parents do. The only major reasons I haven't walked away is because I was raised with the importance of family, so walking away is like jumping into a bottomless pit of the unknown. Second reason is because I'm too nice. I'm a doormat.
Edit 2- Reformatted to fit the rules.