So I (28f) have two really good neighbors who have a couple of kids. One who is the main subject of this post is starting to exhibit disturbing behavior that raises the concerns I have about him being around my own kids who are special need. Mind you I watch horror movies, documentaries and have worked in the criminal field so I am open to being directed into the overreacting side of things. I do not know significant details on their daily lives nor do i want to make assumptions or badmouth or blame. I want to know if i am over reacting and that is all. The parents are great people and have had multiple conversations with the child who we will call steven in this story. Steven is 9 and is usually a sweet kid who i have offered to watch and play video games. He tends to be a sore loser and that is fine. He has adhd which is also not a problem for me. What IS is him mumbling to himself playing a sandbox game talking about bashing people's skulls in and slaughtering people for revenge stories. When I picked up the story I reminded him to keep it PG for my younger kids. He respected it. HE then told me about his world he has in his head where he is a celestial being and he travels through heaven and hell and watches a father drown his children repeated while laughing. I brought this up to the parents and they had a talk with him. The next encounter I had was after Steven apparently strangled a kid on the bus for not showing him something he had. This is a bus my kid will ride next year. and I again brought up concerns about safety but they said he has never done it before and did not get suspended off the bus. I want to remind you fellow reader that I do NOT know about this kids circumstances, potential trauma or day to day challenges. I have not let him around my kids since as my oldest is territorial over her tablet and I do not want to put a 9 year old in a wristlock if he attacks my kid but i will if I have to protect her. I took the family to church and he made a comment about how people at his school should/would (did not catch which word he said so ill add both here) still be slaves. He then stated there is a few black kids there. His dad snapped at him and reminded him his cousins are half black and that is racist. He looked like he was trying very hard to be civil in front of me but looked pissed. I am trying to see a reason of why this kid is being like this. I do not have normal children nor do I want to over react but if this behavior continues and he keeps saying stuff like this I don't really want to interact with this child. AIO?
Note before you ask. I am middle eastern and the family is white. I have seen multiple photos of the cousins and they come over to their house frequently. I know the mom and dad are not racist and look stressed out each time something comes up. I will not overstep another parents decision and ask for therapy or intervention because it is not my business. making choices like doing car lane and avoiding the bus or avoiding the child are choices I can make and do.