Questioning my Relationship
Last week my boyfriend got messy drunk (throwing up and falling) in front of my family and his family. I also had a couple drinks and this sent me into a spiral. My family hasn’t been around since my diagnosis so we’re saying things like “you either love him or you don’t” “if you are questioning things you should leave”. Basically I broke down in front of them and listed things that I’m anxious about even though I had never felt those things before. I was very close to breaking up with him and a few days later I just feel so confused now. Like yes he fucked up but it’s not the end of the world. I think it’s hard because a lot of my ocd is around fear about loved ones harming themselves (addiction,suicide) and also fearing judgement about my decisions from others. We have had a really lovely relationship for many years and he has been my biggest supporter through my ocd journey. Idk I just now feel so confused on “what if my thoughts then are real and I should leave” “what if my parents think I’m dumb” ughh anyway wondering if anyone has advice for this