Hello, I'm a couple years into astrology. I decided to delve deeper into this world in order to learn more about my loved ones, and hopefully uncover potential new insights into them as people. I've gotten around to my own birth chart, and I am not quite understanding my North and South Nodes. The 2nd and 8th houses they're placed in make sense to me, but it's the signs they're in is where I'm stumped. I feel as though throughout my entire life, looking back, I have 100% resonated with my North Node, and my South Node contains traits completely foreign to me. Everywhere I read says "South Node Leos need to unlearn being ego-driven, being the main character, quit being the special child, thinking of yourself as better, being reliant on external validation, being attention seekers, ect."
While the "external validation" one I'd see definitely rings true for me (as I wasn't able to provide my own validation), all the other claims about my character absolutely do not resonate or reflect any part of my life so far. My South Node 100% describes the parts of myself I've always needed more of, and have actively been working on for a while. Making me feel like my North Node should be Leo.
I've never been comfortable being in the spotlight/attention seeker, always been quiet, kept my circle small, and the first 30 years of my life I hardly would ever self-advocate or defend myself. I often forget I'm even present in a room at times. In fact, the best way I can paint the picture for you all; is I've always felt like that camera guy (Lakitu) in Super Mario 64 that you'd only ever see in that mirror room.
Again - North Node "2nd House" and South Node "8th House" definitely speak to me, I have learned a great deal from those. I'm just wondering why my "Aquarius" and "Leo" feel switched? Am I understanding Nodes correctly, or have I just been this loud, boisterous, overly confident person this whole time without knowing? 😅
Thank you for any help I get, I sincerely appreciate it
Ps. Not sure if relevant to nodes, but 3 major relationships I've had were Leos, each not healthy in their own ways. Let's just say, I am retiring from my lion-taming days, lol. Not sure if this is South Node related, probably not.