u/Capakhutch

I have three kids. A 5 year old girl, 3 year old boy, and a 7 month old baby girl.

I do love them and have moments that I cherish sometimes. My 5 year old had a bad dream and came to bed with me the other day and actually cuddled with me, which is so unusual for her since she’s not touchy feely and I savored it. I feel joy reading her stories that she writes and am in awe at how smart she is. I love how sweet and empathetic my 3 year old is. I love watching them play together. I love my baby’s chubby cheeks and the funny sounds she’s starting to make. I love her cuddles.

Despite these positive feelings though, I dread my kids coming home from preschool every day and often don’t want to do anything with them. I hate playing with them and getting out of the house and doing something “fun” sounds exhausting and miserable. They fight a lot and whine constantly and I get very easily overstimulated. My 5 year old is so intense and does not stop talking. I want to escape whenever I’m with them.

I get breaks. They’re in preschool for 4 hours per day and I have a gym membership with childcare. I was diagnosed with ADHD last year and Ritalin has helped me a lot with some major irritability I had during previous postpartum periods. The ritalin gives me motivation, focus, and helps me not snap at my kids, but my joy is still gone.

I became a SAHM to take joy in my kids in these younger years. I don’t know why I can’t. After my first daughter, I was so happy. I used to take joy in every single thing she did. I used to sing with her and swing her around and dance. I was truly happy. I don’t know what’s wrong with me now. I want to feel like me. I want to cherish my time with my kids and feel the surges of joy that I used to.

My psychiatrist prescribed me Lexapro if I wanted to take it, but I’m terrified.

Has anyone else gone through something similar?

I posted here a little while ago about how I finally realized that I need to take my life back and not have my world revolve around my kids. I had started a volunteering thing every other Saturday and was on the moon, I was so happy.

Well, my baby apparently had other plans because she started completely refusing a bottle, won’t be comforted by anyone but me, and I joined a gym with childcare and she only lasts about 30-40 minutes before needing me. I had to cancel my volunteering because there’s no way I can leave her for 6-7 hours.

I feel trapped. She also hates solids. I’ve tried a straw cup with milk too and no luck so far. Anyone else deal with something similar?

We have always been pretty inconsistent with offering bottles to my baby, but up until now, she at least would take them begrudgingly if I wasn’t around.

After having 3 kids in 5 years, I finally found something that gets me out of the house doing something I love once a week, and now she is completely refusing bottles. She won’t do the straw cup either and has HATED any purees that I’ve tried so far.

I want to cry and run away. I feel trapped. I love breastfeeding but the fact that I couldn’t even wean if I wanted to now makes me resentful.

I was diagnosed with ADHD last year and I strongly suspect my 5 year old daughter might have it. We just went through an evaluation process where she was diagnosed with selective mutism, social anxiety, mild ODD, and won't meet the criteria for ADHD unless the teachers' survey also points to ADHD.

At school, she's always the first one to complete her work, she is at the 97th percentile in her standardized tests, sits still, follows directions, and is a very quick learner. She doesn't ever throw tantrums, cry, have outbursts, etc.

At home, she is very easily distracted, struggles to follow instructions even when she's not being defiant (she will start doing something then find something else she wants to do and then says, "Oh I forgot!"), cannot sit in her chair properly for meals without constant reminders, is always losing things, has emotional regulation issues, etc.

When I was a kid, I was also very intelligent, school initially came easy for me, and I was a model student. I started having attention issues around 4th grade, but my teachers would have never known because I compensated by teaching myself at home using the homework. I would cry every night and have panic attacks because of my procrastination and having to spend SO much time doing homework because I wasn't focusing in class. So because of this, I probably wouldn't have even met the criteria for ADHD until I was a preteen. Is this going to happen to my daughter too?