self vs. self
problem: saw this screenshot attached on my fyp a while ago and got too deep in my thoughts again 🙃
context: upon observing my past relationships, i've noticed how much of a giver i am—not that i'm forced to for the sake of reciprocation/to receive the same amount of love, time, and energy i've given. instead, that's just who i really am with my partner; clingy, expressive, yapper. i understand that sometimes, that can be overwhelming for the receiving end but i've also come to realize after talking to my friends about it, am i also setting myself up to be in a position where i'll experience more pain in the future if ever? but i absolutely despise burying that version of me because that's just not ME. it's just so extremely draining to pretend someone i'm not and sometimes, that just comes out naturally.
i've been dreading this problem since the start of the year and wanted to get other people's thoughts on this too.