u/CameraOpen9388

I (25F) have a best friend (25F) I’ve been friends with since we were 12. I see her almost every weekend. We also share another friend but this girl and I are the closest. We send each other voice notes throughout the day, see each other, etc. We’ve never had a proper argument. Maybe we’ve bickered a bit on a night out but that’s about it, as far as it goes. Anyway, she’s the type of person that loves going out partying and drinking and she knows I’m not that type of person. I haven’t gone out in years, really. I don’t drink much also, because it affects me worse than normal people. I use to go clubbing and stuff with her when we were in our early 20s. We recently went to our friend’s sibling’s birthday and I had a cocktail, but my best friend wanted me to drink more after I finished. There was no tension. Then, a few weeks after that, my friend has been asking me to go to dinner and then pub for a drink. I agreed, we went to dinner and then went to this pub.

I didn’t feel like drinking alcohol by the time I got there and the toilet had no loo roll so I didn’t want to drink anything and then need the loo. My friend said it was weird that I didn’t have a drink and she did and I said it wasn’t weird. But at this point, we are having a good time. We then spent another few hours with each other, she wanted to walk an hour from one part of the city to the other. I walked with her, it was very long and my feet were getting tired by the end. Once we got to the busy street, I said I want to call an uber to get home. It’s around 10pm. The train station is just like 2 blocks away, and this is a safe street because it’s quite busy. My friend says she wants me to walk the entire way to the station and I say I’ll go half way, as I’ve already been walking with her for like over an hour (didn’t say the last bit, just that I’d walk half way). She says okay, but as we’re walking, she completely changed and switches up. Her tone shifts and she starts demanding I start taking my Uber now and I don’t need to walk with her even halfway, she starts insisting and stuff. I say that it’s fine, I’ll go half way. Then I made some casual comment in conversation that my feet hurt. I thought she was going to joke about my level of fitness as we sometimes joke about that. But she starts saying something else. She asks me if I’m not worried that I’m going to look back and have regrets about my life as a young adult? I was like not really. She then starts saying that I never go out. I’m like what do you mean by go out? She says I never go out on weekends, that I don’t go to the cinemas, museums, etc. By the way, this is entirely untrue - especially the cinema part! I start saying that’s not true, I do those things. And she’s like really? Her tone is kind of attacking and I’m a bit shocked as it seems kind of out nowhere.

At this point we are going out separate ways. By the way, I am someone that works all week - 45 hours a week. My friend is unemployed and has been for almost a year now and she has never worked before either, she’s just been in uni for the past few years. She has a boyfriend who is quite “popular” and sociable and she always feels she has to “match” him in popularity. So I wasn’t sure if she was just randomly projecting on to me. She has slightly more friends than I do, but I would say we are each other’s most stable friends.

Ever since then, our conversations have been a lot shorter. She isn’t engaging in conversation with me as much, she doesn’t respond like she use to, she also hasn’t asked to meet up for the past two weeks. She hasn’t said anything to me about it, and other than the lack of consistency, she hasn’t said she’s mad or anything and she’s talking with me like normal but just way less engagement and saying things that sort of end the conversation. I just find it so bizarre. If she is angry, I would say it’s a massive overreaction. I can’t tell what’s going on. I spoke to our other friend about it, and she said that our friend told her the same thing about how she never goes out, etc. I said I was wondering if she is still mad at me, and my other friend said nah. But it’s real weird, this is someone I’ve known since 12 years old and this has never happened before. We literally spend most of our hangouts mostly shopping and going to dinner and going to new places. I asked if we could get coffee this weekend and she said she can’t and I said alright, maybe next weekend? And she didn’t respond to that part of the convo. I don’t know if it’s something she’s going through personally or it’s related to our last meeting.

I (25F) have a best friend (25F) I’ve been friends with since we were 12. I see her almost every weekend. We also share another friend but this girl and I are the closest. We send each other voice notes throughout the day, see each other, etc. We’ve never had a proper argument. Maybe we’ve bickered a bit on a night out but that’s about it, as far as it goes. Anyway, she’s the type of person that loves going out partying and drinking and she knows I’m not that type of person. I haven’t gone out in years, really. I don’t drink much also, because it affects me worse than normal people. I use to go clubbing and stuff with her when we were in our early 20s. We recently went to our friend’s sibling’s birthday and I had a cocktail, but my best friend wanted me to drink more after I finished. There was no tension. Then, a few weeks after that, my friend has been asking me to go to dinner and then pub for a drink. I agreed, we went to dinner and then went to this pub.

I didn’t feel like drinking alcohol by the time I got there and the toilet had no loo roll so I didn’t want to drink anything and then need the loo. My friend said it was weird that I didn’t have a drink and she did and I said it wasn’t weird. But at this point, we are having a good time. We then spent another few hours with each other, she wanted to walk an hour from one part of the city to the other. I walked with her, it was very long and my feet were getting tired by the end. Once we got to the busy street, I said I want to call an uber to get home. It’s around 10pm. The train station is just like 2 blocks away, and this is a safe street because it’s quite busy. My friend says she wants me to walk the entire way to the station and I say I’ll go half way, as I’ve already been walking with her for like over an hour (didn’t say the last bit, just that I’d walk half way). She says okay, but as we’re walking, she completely changed and switches up. Her tone shifts and she starts demanding I start taking my Uber now and I don’t need to walk with her even halfway, she starts insisting and stuff. I say that it’s fine, I’ll go half way. Then I made some casual comment in conversation that my feet hurt. I thought she was going to joke about my level of fitness as we sometimes joke about that. But she starts saying something else. She asks me if I’m not worried that I’m going to look back and have regrets about my life as a young adult? I was like not really. She then starts saying that I never go out. I’m like what do you mean by go out? She says I never go out on weekends, that I don’t go to the cinemas, museums, etc. By the way, this is entirely untrue - especially the cinema part! I start saying that’s not true, I do those things. And she’s like really? Her tone is kind of attacking and I’m a bit shocked as it seems kind of out nowhere.

At this point we are going out separate ways. By the way, I am someone that works all week - 45 hours a week. My friend is unemployed and has been for almost a year now and she has never worked before either, she’s just been in uni for the past few years. She has a boyfriend who is quite “popular” and sociable and she always feels she has to “match” him in popularity. So I wasn’t sure if she was just randomly projecting on to me. She has slightly more friends than I do, but I would say we are each other’s most stable friends.

Ever since then, our conversations have been a lot shorter. She isn’t engaging in conversation with me as much, she doesn’t respond like she use to, she also hasn’t asked to meet up for the past two weeks. She hasn’t said anything to me about it, and other than the lack of consistency, she hasn’t said she’s mad or anything and she’s talking with me like normal but just way less engagement and saying things that sort of end the conversation. I just find it so bizarre. If she is angry, I would say it’s a massive overreaction. I can’t tell what’s going on. I spoke to our other friend about it, and she said that our friend told her the same thing about how she never goes out, etc. I said I was wondering if she is still mad at me, and my other friend said nah. But it’s real weird, this is someone I’ve known since 12 years old and this has never happened before. We literally spend most of our hangouts mostly shopping and going to dinner and going to new places. I asked if we could get coffee this weekend and she said she can’t and I said alright, maybe next weekend? And she didn’t respond to that part of the convo. I don’t know if it’s something she’s going through personally or it’s related to our last meeting.

Has anyone ever done this and is it achievable?

I’ve now gone to two different hairdressers. The first one did highlights and balayage on me, it got to a dark blonde. Then I went back and asked for it be close to platinum, she made it just slightly lighter so it was like yellow blonde. I went to another hairdresser that did highlights on me (after two months) and just corrected my roots. She told me I’ll need to book a balayage to even out the colours later. The thing is, my hair is now strips of brassy gold and some lighter ones. I’m just spending so much money on this stuff and it’s not even the colour I want. Is it possible to just do it at home and do some people do this? I want the colour very light blonde/ close to platinum.