AITAH for crying and canceling dinner with my bf’s parents last minute?
i’m 18F, my boyfriend is 19M, and we’ve been together for about 5 months. i was supposed to have dinner with his parents for the 2nd time this weekend, but my boyfriend was in a really mean mood all day. i was getting ready for the dinner while on facetime with him. he kept criticizing me for every little thing. first i had too much makeup on, then when i redid my face he said i looked too dark (ive got dark skin). he said i had dark circles under my eyes and wanted me to fix them, but a) that’s kind of just naturally how i look and b) fixing that would mean a lot of makeup… which he already said not to do.
then when i finally got my makeup to a way he liked, he immediately started asking what i was going to wear, and then vetoed literally every single thing in my closet. like every item was either too casual, too formal, too colorful, too plain, EVERYTHING. and on anything that was even a little bit fitted on me he would say that it’s too tight and at one point he went “kinda weird that so many of your clothes are this tight” which just set me off and i started crying. i’ve been slacking on exercise recently just because of work and school and it was just the straw that broke the camel‘s back i guess.
i was already super stressed about meeting his parents and i felt like shit and i couldn’t stop myself. he sat there on ft watching me sniffle like an idiot and then when i said “i’m sorry but i think i’m just going to stay home tonight” he started trying to calm me down and talk me into going and meeting his parents. he said he’s just worried because he wants them to like me and he’s sure we can find something in my closet i can wear, but i just felt like shit and i had already ruined my makeup so i just told him no i’m sorry i’m staying home. he got mad and said if i didn’t want to meet his parents i could have just said so but he’ll go talk to them. then he hung up.
about an hour later he sent me this long text where he said i was being manipulative by crying and i “always do this” when he gives me honest criticism, but i don‘t feel manipulative i just feel bad about myself and guilty for not seeing his parents. i was talking about it to my friends and most of my girl friends said that he was being an asshole, but my 2 guy friends both said i should give him some slack because he was probably just worried about me meeting his parents. so now i'm not really sure. am i an AH for breaking down and canceling last minute?