My sister’s baby recently got diagnosed with RSV. The doctor said it’s mild right now and mostly just needs monitoring unless symptoms get worse, but she asked me to watch him while she and her boyfriend work because she doesn’t want him around other kids.
The issue is that I’ve been openly childfree for years. Everyone in my family knows I don’t want kids and that babysitting overwhelms me. I love my nephew, but even watching him for short periods completely drains me mentally. Recently I watched him for hours after staying up all night because my sister got called into work, and I ended up crying afterward from how stressed and exhausted I felt.
Now that he’s sick, she wants me to help again because I’m currently unemployed and “available.” But honestly, the thought of watching a sick baby for long work shifts makes me anxious and overwhelmed. I told her I love him and care about him, but I can’t handle taking on that kind of responsibility.
What frustrates me is that she already knows how I feel about childcare. I’ve been honest about it for years, but she still asks me every time she needs help and it makes me feel guilty for saying no.
I feel bad because I know my family is probably going to think I’m selfish, especially since I’m not working right now. But at the same time, I feel like just because I’m free doesn’t mean I automatically become the backup caregiver.
Am I selfish?