I am not diagnosed nor am I self diagnosing myself I just feel depressed all the time I'm scared to go to school I'm not being bullied or even teased I don't really even interact with anyone the only friends I have are a few at school and online but I have no motivation to get on the game most of the time.
I have a girl that I really enjoy being around but I can tell she's losing interest because I hardly talk to her not that I can blame her but I can never figure out what to say my mind draws a blank when I text her.
I don't really go out, I'm 18 and I've never had a job and I hate leaving my house.
I've recently started smoking weed and that helps me forget for a few hours but then I'm back where i started.
I don't do any of my hobbies anymore I always feel tired but it's so hard to sleep because I know when I wake up that I'll have to interact with people and I get an anxious feeling in my stomach so the only time I feel comfortable is when I'm high or I have nothing to do the next day. (No I don't think it's the weed I've felt this way before I started smoking)
I don't wanna tell anybody because I have no reason to feel this way I'm not being bullied or abused I'm not being taken advantage of I'm not poor and I haven't lost anyone and if I say anything I might as well just be an attention seeker cause that's what they'll think.
Whenever It's really bad and I feel like I'm going to cry but all I ever do is tear up a little bit I know it's weird to want to cry but I feel like I'm going to throw up otherwise.