Never. Date. Someone. Unmedicated.
I have unfortunately gone through the worst breakup of my entire life after 1 year 1month with someone with bipolar 2. My fiancé discarded me after I was there for her every step of the way, thick and thin.
She was incredible at the beginning, she was taking meds, we connected really well and she was so calm, relaxed and we were falling in love really hard.
But after she took herself off her meds she began free falling into depressive/hypomanic episodes that left me in a world of hurt, she cheated, treated me terribly and blamed me for everything everytime she felt suicidal or depressed. But I loved her and I forgave her because I understood her condition and felt remorseful. She even got a tattoo of my name on her hand.
Her mom eventually kicked her out during the summer (her family also have a history of mental disorders) which I happily took her in since she had no where to go.
We lived together for 8 months, I really enjoyed just taking care of her and being there for her even if she villainized me and would hit me if I left dirty clothes on the ground and didn’t pick them up. Her family always took her side anytime she would do something terrible to me and justify her behavior which didn’t help at all.
I literally cooked her food after 16 hour shifts because she refused to get up and get herself food, but I never complained and I always did everything for her. Anytime I wasn’t at 100% to do things for her she over fixated on that infallibility to the max and made sure I was punished for it in different ways.
I loved her so much, I just wanted to not give up, I’m a romantic at heart and when I fall in love I promise forever truthfully. But the last 2 weeks of our relationship she cancelled getting married, cancelled all the trips we planned with friends and family, and just argued with me everyday about stuff I said months ago during our heated arguments. She eventually left me and immediately started talking to several different guys on social media and even added exs back.
All in all, I wasn’t perfect either and I got very upset at her when she would treat me horribly, but I have to understand that this is not a normal way of life and that I do wish I could go back and never dated her so I could save myself the hurtful memories and traumatic times.
I miss her, I still love her, but after being discarded like this it’s opened my eyes that you cannot date someone that refuses to take medication. It’s a losing battle. One that’ll haunt you and hurt you.
If you’re bipolar, please take meds not just for yourself but also for your loved ones. Please.