u/ButterscotchNice1406 — reddlx

▲ 4 r/limerence

Sorry this is long. I'm(34F) I joined this subreddit because I believed I had limerence, but I'm not sure if it's limerence or just my ocd.

(I maladaptive daydream & I'm diagnosed ocd)

Possible 1st time: I was 26, we worked together & I became obsessed. He would look at me & I would smile uncontrollably, If he didn't show up to work, I had a horrible time & wanted to leave, I'd make any excuse to talk to him. I would also talk about him to everyone. We were friends on snap & I would watch his snaps over & over & I would get jealous of his gf. He broke up with her & we began dating after. We dated for 1.5 years until he moved back to his home town. When we began dating my obsession went away.

Possible 2nd time: at 30 I lived alone, worked from home & didn't have a car (totaled). Due to the isolation I got lonely so I became fixated on this guy I never dated but had a crush on in my teens. It was the biggest crush I ever had, the kind that gives you butterflies & u physical can't talk when they're around. He had a crush on me as well but I went away to college so nothing ever happened. I hadn't spoken to him since I was 20 but for some reason I became fixated on him. Stalking his social media, daydreaming of being in a relationship with him ect. That lasted close to a year until I stayed with my sister for a few month & got an in person job.

Possible 3rd time: at 32, I worked with this guy for 6 month before I became obsessed. I'd check the schedule to see when he worked, I'd make excuses to go to his area. Work was terrible without him. I thought about him day & night then we started dating & the obsession went away. He had a lot of trauma so I helped him get in a PTSD facility.

Possible 4th time: recent, at 34, this 20M started to give me signs. He would say he was leaving but then see me & would stay late talking. When I talked to him, he would smile uncontrollably, he'd tell me I look great & say I look really young. He would try to get us to be alone but I would shut it down. I started sexually fantasizing about him but I could never cross that line with how young he is. I found out a 23F liked him, so I decided to get them together. The only thing is I still checked the scheduled to see where he was. If he didn't come in, work was rough. I'd think about him constantly. The 23F told me he didn't like her, (they're friends) so I started giving her tips on how to captivate him & I would also bring her up in conversations with him & in 2 weeks they got together. It was bittersweet for me. I didn't spiral & I was happy but a bit jealous. However I knew this was the best outcome because it wasn't appropriate for me.

I never fell in love with my possible LO, & the obsession always went away if we started dating. Do these sound like Limerence?

I'll also add this post this to the OCD sureddit.

reddit.com

u/ButterscotchNice1406 — 8 days ago

▲ 1 r/LabiaplastySurgery

I did not shave for my surgery nor take before pics because I had so much going on I forgot.

Pics are as follow:

1)Day 1 po (2)day 3 po (3)Day 6 po (4)day 13 po

The last one "The Claw" looks dark but she doesn't look like that today.

I call her "The Claw" in my Toy Story alien voice lol

I got the Wedge done by my obgyn on April 17th & it was paid by my insurance. My recovery was good. My pain never went above a 5. I go back to work on monday because I have a physical job. I'm not in pain at all and havent been for 2-3 days, I stayed in bed & rarely moved, I used disposable underwear (diapers really) up until yesterday. I feel good & I'm happy with my results & I know the claw will eventually subside. My left side will be larger but that doesn't bother me, I'm really happy.

But I wanted to bring up a very intimate conversation that I feel like no one has brought up from what I've seen & I wanted too just in case there's other women that had this problem.

The biggest thing that was tough for me to handle was my hygiene. I use non scented feminine wash & I use my hands to clean every nook & cranny in my vagina (not inside).

So the biggest challenge for me was not being able to do that & it really messed with my mind. By day 3 I had an odd smell (I have a sensitive nose like a hound dog lol) & the peri bottle & letting the water run down was not enough. It wasn't a fishy smell but I can't describe it because I never smelled that before. It drove me crazy. I started using a q-tip to gently clean around my labia & lips everyday, not going near "The Claw" & that helped. On day 13th, I wasn't sensitive nor in pain anymore so I decided to really try to clean every nook & cranny with a q-tip gently. So finally I was able to clean all the smegma & I finally felt so much better. I know it's very personal but I was so scared because I googled it & the first thing it said is that you should not have a smell after labiaplasty, that can mean an infection, so I was freaking out because I didn't look nor feel like I had an infection & it was driving me nuts until I found online that smegma can cause a smell if too much buildup happens & since I still have a lot of areas that flip & flop, I had a lot of smegma built up.

u/ButterscotchNice1406 — 13 days ago

▲ 12 r/AskWomenOver30

Just curious about all diff types of womens opinions & facts about this topic.

I understand the criticism around women getting older & how that can put pressure on us. But I'm having difficulty understand the whole botox, filler craze going on.

So many actors, influencers, everyday women are getting botox & fillers & here is where I'm confused, comments from society/public/podcast etc are telling these entertainers to stop getting botox & filler. The entertainers responds that they're doing it for themselves & no one else. When society is saying this doesn't look good, they are being told you don't have to like it, it's not for you, mind your business, stop commenting on peoples looks ect so how is that societal pressure, when society keeps saying it doesn't look good? Are they only listening to one side of society that I'm missing? But if they're saying they did it for themselves & no one else how is that societal pressure?

There's already a conversations about wanting to ban actors with botox & fillers in period pieces & not hiring actors with botox in emotional films due to their inability to express emotion.

More actors are coming out, talking about aging naturally & they're being praised. There's constant post online about the 90s & early 2000s when people had unique faces & looked diff because actors, models & influencers today are all starting to look the same. So why is it still considered as it's the patriarchy or societal standards/pressures? I'm looking for different insight, views, facts, & opinions from women.

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u/ButterscotchNice1406 — 14 days ago