I (23F) need some outside perspective because I feel like I’m going crazy.
My boyfriend (23M) and I have already been having issues — I recently found out he’s been emotionally cheating on me with multiple women. So going into this, I was already anxious and on edge.
He went on a 5-day cruise with his friends, and because of everything that happened, he bought the WiFi package “just for me” so we could stay in contact. He told me he’d call me every day and make sure I felt okay.
Day 1:
He actually followed through. He was super attentive — texting and calling me all day. He even called me at 2am drunk telling me how much he loves me, that I’m the only one he wants, that I have nothing to worry about, etc. It gave me a little bit of relief.
Day 2:
Completely different story. I got maybe 3–4 texts all day, and they were short, one-word responses. He said he slept all day because he was “sick,” then told me he was going to bed at 11:30pm.
But I woke up around 3am and saw he had read my message at 1:15am and had been active on social media… so clearly he wasn’t just asleep like he said. No call either, even though he promised.
Day 3 (Mexico port day):
I had to text him first just to get a response. He said he had an excursion planned with his friends at 10:30am. I texted him a few times throughout the day — nothing.
By 6:30pm I finally told him how I was feeling. He didn’t respond until 9:30pm saying he “slept through Mexico” and didn’t have his phone.
I honestly don’t buy that at all. His friends are big drinkers/partiers — there’s no way they just let him sleep through an entire port day, especially after he told me he had plans.
Day 4:
He texted me in the morning saying he misses me and will see me tomorrow, then said “disappearing, going to the pool” around 11:30am.
I didn’t hear from him again for the rest of the day. But again… he was active on social media.
At this point I’m just exhausted and confused. I feel like I’m asking for the bare minimum — just basic communication and reassurance, especially after he cheated and promised he’d do better.
I don’t understand how someone can say all those things Day 1 and then basically disappear the rest of the trip. Like… do I just not cross his mind at all?
Am I overreacting, or is this behavior as bad as it feels?
TL;DR:
My (23F) boyfriend (23M) emotionally cheated on me, then went on a 5-day cruise and promised to stay in contact to reassure me. Day 1 he was super attentive, but the rest of the trip he barely responded, gave inconsistent excuses, and was active on social media while ignoring me. I feel like he’s not showing up for me at all — am I overreacting?