Burner account, just in case someone sees this.
I have made a huge mistake three years ago. Something that I talked out with some of my friends back then and tried to improve upon.
Recently, said mistake came back and everyone pretty much scrutinized me. I explained my point of view which ended up making it sound worse.
It’s clear that I didn’t improve at all, despite believing I did. And understanding the severity of, I decided it would be easier to end it. Because then I could ensure something like that could ever happen again.
I didn’t tell this thought process to anyone. And in fact, ever since the start of the week, I had a feeling I wouldn’t survive until the end.
So, to come back to my question. What point is there to continue, when you keep on hurting the ones you care about? These people already have a lot to deal with and my existence is just adding to it. I want to give them some peace, removing myself from the mere possibility of ever hurting someone else again.
Additionally, if I were to do it, how should I without my family having to find me? I have a sister who doesn’t deserve to find out that way. But she also doesn’t deserve an older sibling like me.