I 18F have feelings for my 18M best Friend but he’s in a relationship
So I met my friend Tom 18M about 11 months ago trough a mutual friend when we found out we would be going to the same school. When classes started we were put in the same class and bonded quickly over being from the same place. We both moved around 13 hours by car from our homes to attend this school and I think we both found comfort in having someone from the same place to talk to. When we met we were both in a relationship, me with Sebastian 20M and he with Lilly 18F.
I broke up with Sebastian a few weeks ago due to some serious issues I won’t get into here. I also noticed a few months ago that I started developing some feelings for my Tom.
I know him and Lilly have some issues and that his family isn’t really fond of her. He often complains about her and I know it’s sick, but I keep hoping they break up. I have been trying to suppress my feelings but I get really jealous when she calls him while we’re hanging out and I hate myself for it. I don’t actually want to ruin their relationship but I’m so angry with Lilly even though I don’t know her. I see how sad she makes Tom and it really hurts me to see him like that.
We’re about to move home soon and I can’t help dreading no longer being able to see him each day. How can I get rid of my feelings and be a supportive friend? I really want to confess but I treasure our friendship way to much and I can’t bear the thought of loosing him. What should I do, should I confess and get it over with or just suppress my feelings for him? Is it wrong for me to continuing to hang out with him while secretly hoping he dumps Lilly? I’m so lost and I feel like a major asshole no matter what I do and could really use some advice. Thank you.