Positive Vibes cuz This Shit Hurts
Fellow fissure folks - like you I’m currently sitting here with intense spasms after a BM 45 minutes ago (the heating pad helps). The pain radiates through my back and legs and takes the biggest impact on my mental health tbh. It consumes me.
And- today is by birthday. I’m thankful to be here on my 40th with an amazing family, kids, friends, career, and so many other things to be thankful for. These things are tough to think about when the pain gets so bad-but I felt like this was the moment to pause with you all and try and hold both things, pain and gratitude.
Im on month 7, and just got the second round of Botox and still in pretty bad shape after a week. Stating up with MiraLAX, benefiber, 1.5 gallons of water daily, warm shower water, heating pad, Tylenol/ibupofen combo and lidocaine. I’m not out of the woods, and I miss my gym workouts so so so bad.
And- today I’m going to trust that this too WILL pass. I’m not sure when, but I’m going to focus on today, and this moment and have hope that after 7 months things will get better. And if anything this post is just as much for me to get these thoughts out there than they are to help you.
Sending the best vibes possible today.