She's probably (definitely) right, but it's still upsetting to hear. Me and my partner are going through a very rough patch right now and we're currently on a break. I was talking about something that happened with them, and during my session with the therapist I said "I don't know, I don't think that my wanting to stay is a BPD thing this time, I really do love them..." and she said "Well, it is." She said it lightheartedly, but it still felt awful. It makes me feel like a desperate, crazy person when even my therapist thinks I'm only staying because of my mental illness.
I truly don't think my desire to stay this time is from the BPD. I've stayed in relationships because of the BPD and it doesn't feel like this. I don't feel trapped right now. I don't feel like I'm coercing myself to stay or like staying is the only option... I know that I can leave. Like, I know that if I left I could make it through, especially since I'm in DBT and also because I have a large support network who would help me get through it. I legitimately want to stay. But how can I know that's truly how I feel if even my therapist thinks it's just because of the disorder? I feel so lost.