Not sure if I should confront my 30F boyfriend 35M about his OF use.
I (30F) have been with my (35M) boyfriend for 2 years. We’re currently in the process of buying a house together. Sorry, this may be a bit long but just trying to give background.
A few months back, we were out to dinner with another couple and he got his phone out to check an email for them, I looked over and caught a look at an only fans membership email - wasn’t intending to snoop, I just looked over and it was on his screen.
When we got home I asked him about it because I was honestly kind of crushed. For context, our intimacy only seems to be on his terms, and I have to initiate everything. Often it will just be me getting him off, that’s it. We have sex very rarely but used to be at it all the time. He’s always used to pleasure me too before, though never orally, but now I can count on one hand the times he’s touched me since the start of the year.
Knowing he used OF made me feel so rejected and like I was the problem as clearly he was horny and looking to get his rocks off, just apparently not with me. Anyway he promised the email was confirmation of his subscription ending, and that he only signed up ages back before we were together and he was between girlfriends. Which made sense and he seemed so sorry he’d causes me to be hurt, so I let it go.
Fast forwards to today, he’s out all day, I was messing about on my phone - he shared his OneDrive with me ages ago and I was browsing. There is newly downloaded content there from April which is clearly OF material. I feel betrayed, hurt and rejected all over again, but I don’t know if it’s an initial knee jerk reaction. There could be an innocent explanation (if you squint real hard maybe and tilt it on its side?) I don’t know if this is worth causing an argument or if it’s just me being insecure again. He didn’t exactly hide it from me because he downloaded it to a shared drive…I need advice on how to handle this please.