u/Bitter-Bug5468

am i justified for feeling uncomfortable about my boyfriend’s coworker crossing boundaries?

I’m posting this because I genuinely can’t tell if my feelings are valid anymore or if I’m just becoming overly sensitive from repeated situations. I don’t want to be controlling, toxic, or the kind of girlfriend that polices friendships, so I wanted outside opinions from people who are unbiased. My boyfriend and I have had multiple conversations about boundaries with other girls because there have been a few situations that made me uncomfortable in the past with a friend of mine who had been crossing some boundaries and him not removing himself from the friendship. Every time we talk about it, he reassures me that our relationship is his priority and that he understands why certain things hurt me.

Recently he sent me a picture of his desk at work and I noticed a Post-it note stuck on his computer that looked like it was written by a female coworker calling him a flirty nickname coupled with the fact that he has had it hanging on his desk for god knows how long like it meant something to him. It immediately made my stomach drop. Maybe that sounds dramatic, but paired with previous situations, it just felt overly familiar and disrespectful to our relationship.

We talked about it afterward, and I explained why it bothered me. From his perspective, he feels like he puts a lot of effort into making me feel secure and prioritized in every other aspect of our relationship, which is true. He genuinely is a very loving and attentive boyfriend overall. He basically said that to him, a small note like that means absolutely nothing compared to the life we’re building together and everything we have. I also get the feeling that when I bring these things up, he feels like I don’t trust him or like I’m implying he’s a bad boyfriend, which honestly is not what I’m trying to say at all.

What hurts the most is that I’m not trying to control his friendships or tell him he can’t talk to women. I trust him. I just want to feel like he’s protective over our relationship and mindful of boundaries, especially after we’ve already talked about this stuff multiple times. Instead, I keep feeling like I’m put in situations where I have to bring things up again and again because something else happens that makes me uncomfortable.

And honestly, it scares me because this is someone I see a serious future with. We talk about soulmates, marriage, building a life together, etc., so when things like this happen it makes me start doubting whether he’s really as all-in as he says he is.

Am I being unreasonable for feeling hurt over something “small” like this?

I (F23) am considering Nexplanon as a birth control option, but I’m really concerned about the possibility of weight gain. I was hoping to hear about other people’s experiences with the implant, especially regarding changes in weight and appetite. I’m 5’1” and around 100 lbs, and my weight has stayed pretty consistent my whole life. I’m also very conscious about what I eat and live a pretty active lifestyle. I go to the gym about 4–5 times a week. I’d really appreciate hearing honest experiences, both positive and negative.

I’ve seen so many mixed experiences online with some people saying they gained a lot of weight and others saying nothing changed at all. I know everyone reacts differently to hormones, but I think hearing real experiences would help calm my anxiety a bit.

If you were someone who was naturally petite/thin before getting Nexplanon, did you notice any weight gain, bloating, appetite changes, or changes in body composition? Did it happen quickly or gradually? And if you did gain weight, was it difficult to lose? I’m also curious if staying active and maintaining healthy eating habits helped prevent weight changes for anyone. Overall would you recommend Nexplanon, or did the side effects outweigh the benefits for you?