It started 5yrs ago, we started speaking on linked in after the boss of the company he was working for head hunted me, me doing
Research on the company saw that he was an employer and reached out to ask a couple questions, my profile had my pic his didn’t but by his name I knew he was going to be my type:) he straight away asked for my number, socials you name it, I declined and told him I was married, to which he replied he was too we were honest with each other from the get go.
From then onwards for 3 months we proceed to talk everyday on linked on while we were at work, the butterflies I felt were electrifying I could t eat I couldn’t sleep I felt like I was going crazy, I have a happy marriage been with my OH for 20+yrs have absolutely no intention of leaving him but speaking to this other man was an out of body experience. I’ve only ever been with my husband no one else ever.
We made plans a few times to see each other but I think nerves got the better of us and one of us would always cancel, after 3 days of talking came the news he was leaving the company and don’t message that account again as he wouldn’t be there. He had my number and said he would get in touch when he could, it was the worse two months I went through, not knowing what was happening or if we would ever talk again.
Then one evening I was going through my emails
And saw a message saying he had added me
On Snapchat, random I know. I added him back and he kept posting stories on it to bait me to reply I guess, I never did. So a few days later one morning he sends me a message and tells me he couldn’t stop Thinking about me and wants to carry things on, I was elated.
We message a few times after that but I just wanted a bit more consistency so told him there was no point on doing any of this as it was consuming my minds all day, he replied ok and that was that. He continues baiting me with his stories and videos on Snapchat but I never replied we stayed in each others lives but silently.
He would make a few fake accounts on instagram pretending to be other people but I would always figure out it was him, he would pretend to be girls boys you name it, he would add me and dm to see what I would say and if I would speak about him. He would never admit
To it and I would never even ask. Then came a day we met, it was 1 yr after we initially started talking, he booked us a hotel room and we met there, I was a nervous wreck, we started kissing each other undressing and he was playing with my breasts commenting how big they were, apart from my husband I had never been touched like this by another man. We undressed fully and got into bed kissing, omg the kissing was amazing I couldn’t get enough, but I was so nervous and scared and couldn’t bring myself to go further, he turned me on my belly kissing my back and bum asking me how did I ever find him I was melting but still couldn’t bring myself to go all the way, we weee both on our lunch break so we wrapped it up, he kissed my my forehead and said bye and that was that. I was full of regret not going all the way with him when I left and msg him again, he asked how did I find it I said it needed repeating to which he replied lol! I was embarrassed, he didn’t continue the convo neither did I, a week later he removed me from snapchat our main source of communication, remember we are both married, he stayed watching me from his fake instagram accounts, every story I put up he was always there, multiple accounts, so when autumn rolled around I added him on Snapchat again he accepted and we carried things on, Now this around things got heated very quickly, we started sending videos of each other with our OH he would say his wife is very vanilla and would sometimes laugh at the videos she would send him which made me feel so sad, I didn’t need that from him, I just wanted the sex aspect of it but the hungry going crazy kinda passion.
It’s been like this for the last 3.5 yrs or so, making plans but the never happen as we both end up cancelling, our fantasies with each other have gone from mild to 100mph, we started talking about threesomes with another guy, he’s bi curious and told me that he only wants to try this stuff with me and would never admit it to his wife, I quite like to watch gay porn sometimes so I would like to see him and another guy at it, also please bear in mind neither of us want to leave our OH we have never ever spoke of being together in that way, he just tells me that he wants to do all the crazy things he can’t do with his wife with me, he wants to pretend I’m his wife and watch other men want me and stuff, last December 2025 I pulled bk my energy from him, he messaged me from a fake account wanting me to meet him and telling me all I do is try and make him jealous and talk about other guys, I do but I never thought he would take notice, he wanted me to go and meet him in the evening and when I wouldn’t answer as I was at work he called on private number. I had enough and pulled bk from him because he was never consistent with me. I think I do have feeling for him but not to leave my husband or anything but I can’t help it. He would carry on messaging me through Xmas and new years but I was very cold in my replies, then one day I go on my account to check and see he has blocked me.
I was lowkey heartbroken, I msged one of his fake insta accounts and told him I know u blocked me, I really liked you I just wanted the same energy back.
He left me blocked for 2months or so, then added me back, I told him he can’t do that to me again he told me he wants me and wants to see me we planned to go and visit a bi masseuse to carry out this fantasy but then I thought before we do that I wanted to see him just us and see what that would be like. I told him I had a room booked and he said he could get away quickly it was evening time we met half way between our houses on a Carriageway hotel. This time I knows I would go all the way I was sick of thinking about him all the time and needed to feel him.
He arrived and we got straight to it kissing undressing and climbed it bed, I gave him a quick bj and he said he couldn’t handle it he was so horny, so we got into bed and when he slipped it in I was so wet and he said again he couldn’t because he was too horny, the whole thing felt like a shambles any touch I gave him whether he slipped it in or I sucker his dick it’s was so quick because he kept saying he was going to cum, the whole thing felt like we were two inexperienced school kids, he cum on my belly after picking up my legs to put on his shoulders and couldn’t handle it, he pulled out but it was two late. I was so deflated he didn’t even ask if I had orgasmed or anything he kept saying he was so horny thinking about all the things we had been talking about that he couldn’t handle it. Now this is a guy who is experienced has had multiple partners and had so much talk about how he could last long and that he wanted to taste me because he never got the chance the first time etc what I had just seen was not that guy. He got up and got dressed and asked so what were we gonna do next, I was dumbfounded, next? We didn’t even do this properly, I noticed him staring at me whilst he was dressing and making a cigarette, I stared back but then I would break eye contact, he told me bye and kissed my cheek and then left!
This was 3 days ago, I’m shocked at how something I had played again and again in my head go so wrong,
The cherry on top of the cake? He hasn’t messaged me since! I refused to reach out first, he left me so confused, questioning myself and whether he’s disappointed or embarrassed, I have no clue! I need advice please I feel so drained from this, 5yrs of fantasising and this is what it led to, does it get better, is this normal.
Help!!!!’