When i get super drunk, I get into that headspace and im trying to figure out how to fix it
Hey everyone,
I’m a 25-year-old Army combat veteran and I’ve been living on the streets/homeless for the last couple of months. I’ve been staying with family/friends lately trying to get back on my feet, but I’m fighting a massive battle in my own head every single day.
Lately, whenever I get way too drunk, a switch flips. I completely check out. I get this 1000-yard stare, go totally quiet, clench my jaw, and get incredibly hypervigilent. My body braces like I’m in a combat zone or about to get into a massive fight, and I start looking at everyone around me like they’re the enemy, even when they’re just trying to help.
Last night it got bad. I was completely locked into that state, and it took my girl and three of my friends physically holding me, her kissing me, and trying to pull me out of it just to ground me and bring me back to reality. It was heavy for them and exhausting for me.
When I’m sober, I see what I’m doing and I hate how I’m pushing away the people throwing me a lifeline, but when I’m drunk, my survival mode takes over entirely.
Do any other combat vets experience this exact same switch flipping when they drink? How do you handle the hypervigilance and stop sabotaging your stability before you burn every bridge you have left? I really need some advice on how to fix this and if sobriety is it then I mean i guess but I just feel bad I had to put them thru that like 3 times already.