u/Big-Communication124

Hi, looking for some general advice. I’ve been separated from my ex for about 7 years and divorced for around 2. I’ve always paid maintenance consistently and have paid additional expenses when they came up. Since the court process ended, however, the situation with expenses has become much more frequent and costly. I’m now being contacted regularly and asked to pay for additional expenses urgently. When I ask for basic details (what the cost is for, dates, or a breakdown), I’m often told to look it up myself rather than being sent proper information or receipts. I’ve asked a few times for itemised details, but this hasn’t improved. For context, I paid a substantial amount in extra expenses late last year on top of maintenance, and this year I’ve been contributing extra monthly towards expenses as well as paying for agreed items like school trips. Despite this, I’m now being asked to pay for further costs from the previous year, including things like school uniforms, shoes, and basic stationery. I was under the impression these routine items would normally be covered by maintenance rather than treated as additional educational expenses. Separately, I haven’t seen my children for around 10 months. They are older teenagers (mid‑teens), and when the matter went to court, I was told nothing could be enforced due to their ages and stated wishes. I’m concerned there may be elements of parental alienation, but I’ve been advised it’s very difficult to prove. I’m trying to be reasonable and supportive, but I also need to put boundaries in place so that expense requests don’t continue to escalate in this way. I’d appreciate any advice on: what types of expenses are usually considered extra versus covered by maintenance, whether it’s reasonable to insist on clear, itemised receipts before paying, and how others manage frequent urgent requests post‑divorce. Thanks in advance.