Does anyone with ROCD (and anxious attachment) struggle with object constancy when in relationships?
When I’m physically with my partner, I feel really connected, secure, loved, and calm. We spend great weekends together, he’s consistent in person, keeps his word, makes time for me, etc.
But once we’re apart, it’s like my brain suddenly stops being able to emotionally hold onto the connection we just had. If texting slows down or communication feels less engaged, I immediately start analyzing things and looking for signs he’s pulling away, even if nothing actually happened in person to suggest that.
Meanwhile I think my bf experiences the relationship as stable between interactions. Like if we had a good weekend together in his mind we’re good/stable unless something explicitly changes. But my brain feels like I need ongoing reassurance/contact to keep feeling emotionally connected and secure. Then because of this I think I place waaayyy too much emotional weight on texting when apart, even more than the actual content of the texts themselves.
Does anyone else experience this? How do you stop treating temporary distance/silence like the relationship is emotionally disappearing?