I need help
Hello, sorry for the title but I really do need help to manage my emotions and stress beacuse it's really affecting my wellbeing and especially health.
Long story short, I work 2 jobs, one full time and one part time, so therapy is out of the question unfortunately, because no therapist works late (as in around 8-9PM).
Happily I'm not burned out, I really enjoy when I'm working at the part time job, but the full time one's toxic environment is killing me. I get bullied from management, micromanaged, long tasks with short deadlines, judged for not staying overtime, and I already got an interview somewhere else but I need to wait until I can pass my resignation.
The thing is that everytime I think of work, or talking to a manager, or receive a work-related message, I get this adrenaline rush (fight or flight) and I'm trying to control it very much but it's "killing" me, I tremble, I get exhausted, I'm very stressed out, I'm short breathed, my heart is racing and I'm struggling to calm down.
I'm currently trying meditation, I had my first 10 min session yesterday, I mostly sit flat in my bed, with white noise in background and do breathing exercises. But what if I'm at work and I need to calm myself down when I get called out, how can I meditate then when someone comes and says "we need to talk".
I really want to overcome this situation, and I have to live with it until I leave this place, but I'm asking if you ever had this type of emotions and how do you manage them (at work and at home).. thank you!