I want to tell you my story because maybe someone can help me get my life back. I am a man. I started watching porn when I was 13 years old. I stopped when I was 14 years old.. Now I have been addicted to porn and masturbating for one year and eight months. I am 18 years old now.
In the beginning of 2024 I was a guy I had a lot of energy I was very masculine and I had this feeling that I just cannot describe. It was like I always wanted to be better than I was before. I was into boxing. I went to the gym to train six days a week. I gained muscle mass. I always had a strong jawline. I was always full of energy. I wanted to improve myself all the time.
Then in September 2024 I was just sitting around. I thought, why not watch porn again? I was very stupid. I did not know what would happen. Now it is May 2026 and I have been stuck in this situation since then.
Watching porn has taken everything away from me. Now I am lazy. I just want to stay in bed all day. I spend about four hours a day staring at my screen. I lost the feeling of wanting to be better. I do not even go to the gym anymore even though I pay for it. I am not doing anything to improve my life. I am just wasting my time.
This is really bad. I hate my life watching porn has taken away my energy, my confidence, my masculinity and my sense of self. I feel like I lost myself. If only I could go back to how I was. I have tried things to stop watching porn. It worked for a little while. I did not watch porn for 11 days.. Then I started again and I could not stop and i couldnt do that again since that
I have tried making schedules and filling up my day with things to do. I never stick to them. I have tried to limit my time on my phone. I have even tried to leave my phone in another room but I am too weak to do that.
Now I spend my time warning my friends about the dangers of watching porn and some of them are able to stay from it but I am still struggling. I feel like I am the one in front of my friends so I do not talk to them about my problems. Nobody knows how much I am hurting inside.
When I feel the urge to watch porn I try to move and do something but I just cannot. I do not think I can think or react when that happens. I just give in. Then I feel terrible about myself. This is the time in my life.
There is one thing. I really like this girl. I want to talk to her but my final exam is, in 15 days and after that I will not see her again. I am too scared to talk to her. I cannot even look her in the eye. I feel like I am broken because of watching porn. This habit is ruining my future. Please help me stop watching porn.