MtF, seeking REAL resources for transgender vaginoplasty. Please. Help me.
first and foremost if you tell me anything- ANYTHING. About regret rates, or how "surgery isn't worth it" or some 4tran bullcrap im going to lose my mind. I WILL remove my penis and testicles somehow, this is and always has been my #1 need.
What i just need is somewhere, a website a forum, something, that isn't:
- full of chasers, bad outcome fetishists, and incels who think transitioning is how they "ascend" or something, or femboys discussing minor estrogen doses and being transphobic to anyone actually transitioning
- only full of non-recovered images/ images of "botched" surgery if any images are present
- gives information about cost, different forms of vaginoplasty/ different procedures, recovery process information, surgeons, testimonials for surgeons, etc etc
I just need resources that aren't encouraging me to end my life instead of living happily. Im so tired of looking for resources only to find chasers who would rather i hate myself so they can ogle my genitals. I'm so dysphoric and i can't take much more.
I just need real resources. Please for the love of god i need something informative.
Edit: For the barest of bare bones research see wikipedia; https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Conversion_therapy
Encouraging any individual to seek "gender exploratorary therapy," (which is in fact what the "trans friendly/gender affirmative therapists" are who write you your notes deeming it acceptable you can transition,) is encouraging longstanding conversion practices. Psychotherapy to determine if you are "really trans" or if you have dome underlying trauma is an even older form of conversion therapy. Please in any further response do not encourage me to seek out these conversion therapists or build rapport with them. Thank you.
E2: This isn't to bash anyone who has had positive experiences with these things, i understand there's no malicious intentions in recommending therapy at all, especially given how depressing dysphoria can be. I, however, have had nothing but absolutely horrible and even downright ridiculous experiences with seeking psychotherapy related to my trans experience or needs, or seeking out "gender exploratory therapists/ gender affirming therapists" whatever you wish to call their system, it's done nothing but hurt me. I'm so genuinely overjoyed so many people in the community can be helped towards transition through openness and time in these circles, i just can't. Don't recommend it to me as a research resource, thank you.