u/BandicootFit5459

Marriage advice?

Married 3 years together 6,
Husband has many personality flaws that have shown up more the longer we have been together - pretty standard I’ve heard for relationships.

These include selfishness, some OCD/ADHD type behaviours that he won’t get sorted or medicated or therapy or anything for, self esteem issues are HUGE constantly lying to others to make self seem amazing, not good with kids gets way too overstimulated very quickly and then has to take a break almost immediately. The list goes on.

I love my husband but my family has been asking about him and his behaviours the longer they’ve known him the more they now see it and are like what’s with so and so why is he saying this and that? Or just down right mad and telling me to make him back off and stop trying to call them (my family doesn’t do well with communicating and think they’re being harassed after like 2 calls in a row 😂).

But now that they see it I finally have someone to talk to about these behaviours and I’m like how do I handle x,y and z but they’re no help either just say change the conversation to something else.

Who do I speak to about navigating a persons challenging behaviour self esteem issues possible adhd and ocd anger and irritability issues when overstimulated due to the adhd and noise sensitivities. ? Should I see a counsellor myself my husband refuses to see a therapist
As a SAHM, with no conversation starting points besides kids how do I start new positive conversations that aren’t to do with my husband or kids and aren’t stressful (money, jobs, economic climate etc) ?
What do married couples even talk about besides basic day to day functioning and financials?

I’ll say because I know people will say just leave him even if I didn’t love him and was going to leave it wouldn’t be a good idea I have no job no savings four young kids we would be way worse off I could never earn what my husband does we would be poverty level.

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u/BandicootFit5459 — 3 days ago

Clitoral adhesions advice

So I don’t know if a have lichen sclerosis I don’t believe I do? But after lots of googling about keratin pearls I believe for the past 3 years I’ve had a mild case of clitoral adhesion/phimosis and heard it can be caused by lichen so thought here was a good place to ask.

So past 3 years have had pearls develop in what I would describe as a little pocket and only twice has it caused pain and I have to continually get them out with difficulty. I would basically scratch them out with my nail and it was painful of course to do so. I can pull the hood back to expose most of the area but it’s a small section that the pearl gets stuck in.

Anyway was trying to get a tough one out and gave up told myself I’d try the next day to to try and realise I must have torn the adhesion/ stuck section because the pearl is gone it seems to pull back a tiny bit more and there’s a red section that looks like it could bleed but hasn’t where the edge of the hood connects. So I’ve torn the adhesive section I guess. Can I just let this heal and monitor see if I’ve fixed the problem ? Probably should get checked maybe 🤔 re adhesions ?

reddit.com
u/BandicootFit5459 — 4 days ago