So… I met this guy online about 2 years ago now and hit it off. I didn’t really do a deep dive on him but when I did I discovered he had a fiancé (now wife) which I obviously brought up. He said they had an arrangement where he could see other women as long he told her. We will call him sexy man.
Him and I decided to meet at a bar.. chemistry and tension was all there but we didn’t do anything. He asked me to meet him and his wifey for drinks a few weeks later so I did. We end up getting a tad drunk and having a three way.
I was a bit uncomfortable by it because I thought the intention was to meet wifey so she could give her stamp of approval or whatever. Anyways, I put distance between us after it.
Fast forward some time, I start dating someone and wanted to put my full commitment, time and energy towards him. I didn’t talk to sexy man for most of the relationship until the end when I was ready to end it.
It was friendly with sexy man and we were just catching up in public a few times. Grabbed drinks and nothing happened. Sexual tension was obviously there. After some time we started sexting and talked about sleeping with each other but schedules or my hesitancy disrupted the timeline.
I told him that I would much rather him tell wifey but it is ultimately his relationship and he has free will to walk away whenever he needs to. And I will respect his decision.
So we slept together two weekends ago and we haven’t really talked since then. It was very enjoyable to say the least for the both of us and even said so himself.
So my question is — why isn’t he telling wifey? We agreed to having an affair but is changing his mind now?
Yes, we are compatible beyond sexual chemistry but we both agreed on only keeping it sexual. He is firm that his feelings are with his wife and wants to be fwb. Although, he did mention he didn’t want to tell wifey because she wouldn’t believe it’s not emotional.
Do yall think that’s accurate?