So sexuality isn’t really on my mind, it’s just not relevant in my brain, so I tend to forget it can complicate things. I started writing a post about my situation on another sub, but then I realised my confusion is probably connected to being ace, so I figured it might be better to post here instead, lol.
In the past I’ve never really come across a guy I could fully vibe with, but I’m also pretty shy and introverted, so I don’t talk to many people. I’ve only had close friendships with girls. Then I met this guy, and it was just really easy to talk to him. We quickly became friends and I feel very close to him now, like we get along really well. That’s where the confusion starts. From the beginning it felt different from my friendships with girls, and I keep questioning why. I can’t tell if it’s because I might have some kind of romantic feelings, or if it’s just because this is my first close friendship with a guy and it’s a new experience.
I’m also not even sure what romantic attraction is supposed to feel like for me. With my female friends, the thought “what if this is more than platonic” has never really come up, but here it does, and I don’t know what to make of that. Sometimes I catch myself wondering how I would handle it if he turned out to have romantic feelings. A friend of mine thinks that might be possible, but I’m not sure. And then I would be stuck because I feel something, but I really can’t tell what kind of feelings they are. They aren’t intense enough that I would say I’m “in love.” I don’t spend my time thinking about how amazing he is, my mind is more focused on analysing how I feel in the dynamic itself. But I overthink it so much that it starts to feel like I must have a crush on him, even though that doesn’t fully feel right either.
I guess I’m just wondering if anyone else has experienced something similar, or how you handle possible romantic feelings in a strong friendship as an ace person.