u/BabyJesus125

My girlfriend and I have been together for about 6 months, and lately I’ve been feeling confused about our relationship when it comes to intimacy and physical closeness. She used to be very physically close to me during the first moths of our relationship but recently, after we spent time together and got a little physical in a consensual way, she later told me she feels like our relationship is better without intimacy and that she doesn’t really want to go further physically right now. I agreed, but honestly only halfheartedly because I didn’t want to pressure her or create an issue. The problem is that before this, over text she would sometimes flirt in intimate ways, say things about doing stuff with me, and say she likes that playful/flirty side of me, so I think that built certain expectations in my head. In real life though, she seems much more uncomfortable or reserved, which makes me feel mixed signals, even though I think she’s probably just conflicted herself. I don’t particularly mean sex or anything major when I talk about intimacy, I more so mean basic comfort with physical closeness here and there, like intimate touching, and stuff like that, and I’m not sure if I’m expecting too much for my age by wanting that. Another factor is that I live somewhere else, so I’m usually the one travelling and spending money whenever we meet because her parents are strict and she can’t really come to me. I do appreciate the time we spend together and I know she has her own limitations too, but sometimes I feel like I’m the one doing more adjusting while she feels like I may want too much physically. Now I’m wondering if removing intimacy completely is the best way forward, or if this is a deeper compatibility issue that we’re both avoiding. What should be my expectations going further in our relationship?