u/BabyBonbori

Hello! I hope your week is starting off wonderful! 💖
What would you call yourself “witchy” wise. I’m still myself out so I’m not sure where I would fit it when it comes to what I practice.

I’m Hispanic, grew up folk catholic (egg cleanses, railroad spikes on the four corners of our property for protection, jumping over saints candles in the middle of the night after night terrors..)

I grew away from the tradition church in my mid twenties, and believe in the universe and nature as my god if you will. Here I am in my thirties.

A lot of spell work I do is based around love and Venus.
I work with Aphrodite and Our lady of Guadalupe.
I do divination using tarot, and talk to my ancestors.

I’ve seen people often call themselves green, chaos, eclectic, and so forth but I myself(?) I’m not sure. What exactly where I would put myself, is it silly to want to be placed somewhere? Is it okay to just do things this way? I want to know more about myself and practices in the area I feel comfortable with but I’m not sure where to start.

Thank you!

I want to love! I want to continue giving and loving in my little life!

I heard when going through a break up with an avoidant you find yourself becoming one yourself, and no, I can’t, I won’t!
I almost did, as the person I was utterly in love with, ended things with me after what I thought and he said was such a healthy and loving relationship, was something we would be in for years to come not just one year of friendship and three official months of dating.
Oh boy- the whiplash my heart felt during and after.
We cried and held eachother all night when he told me he was breaking up with me, due to him needing to work on himself and not wanting to use me as an emotional crutch.
I was wiling to and did, love him through all the bad he thought of when it came to himself while I saw a man I wanted to spend the rest of my life with.

When he broke up with me I said through tears, “I never want to love again, I want the universe to take my ability to love.”
He told me not to think that way because the way I loved was beautiful and unconditional and you know what?
He’s right.
It took a month to see and feel back to my loving self again, but here I am to say, if you are someone who shys aways from love after a break up or discard (because let’s be honest, that’s more hurtful that your traditional break up) I advise, the minute you get to the point of loving again, even if it’s just platonically with family, friends, yourself and maybe just maybe another lover, hold onto that feeling and let it grow like a seed in your hand until it blooms in your heart.

I’ve learned; Some people do not have the captivity to hold your love but in the end if you put your heart out there and love regardless and love after, there is strength in that, and in you. I don’t want someone’s choice for how they treated me to shape the way I treat others, or the way I love.
Maybe it’s a bit of spite to not be someone that could hurt someone else that way, but I want to be someone who leans into love, not avoids it.

And I’m not sure how to go about it…

He ultimately broke up with me, despite him saying it was his first healthiest relationship and I was his most loving girlfriend.
It was long distance but to us that wasn’t an issue.
The breakup happened when we met in person and he flew to see me.
The reason was layered but from what it seemed to me was the thing of wanting to be alone to work on himself and he said he didn’t want to use me as emotional comfort to not do the work.

From there I went no contact and he was slightly reluctant but has been respectful to keep away despite the longing I felt to talk with him. He was my best friend. We spoke on the phone and fell asleep together almost every night, so I had to learn to be okay in my loneliness and I did with the help of family, and friends, but even still I get this rare ache..

And then this morning to my surprise, a heart felt text message.

He expressed to me (in a very romancing letter form) that he still had my locket necklace that I gave him (as I couldn’t keep it because the reminder would be far too painful for me) he also expressed how he was thinking of me at times.

I haven’t replied yet, I typed out a message but my fingers shake when it comes to sending it.

I don’t think he came to me as a way of “coming back” but more so just to check in as he wished me well at the end of it. He didn’t outright speak of missing me, and didn’t dance over the idea of coming back into my life, so I’m confused (?)
Part of my heart is grateful to hear form him, but the other..well that’s why I’m posting for some kind of answer..
Thank you.

Hi! 👋🏻 I hope all of you are well!

I have had only my cards to talk with on my break up, my family and friends too but I’m sure they are tired of hearing of him hahah!

Even still, I miss him terribly, and we left the relationship in love.

He broke up with me.

I decided no contact as I was forced to move on from something and someone I still wanted.

He was blue about the nc but respected it and we went out separate ways.

Now, a month and a half later, I’m wondering how he’s feeling about me. He said he would always love me, like I would him buuuuut I know things change.

Still I have pulled the same cards multiple times but would love a second opinion! Thank you!

2 of swords, hanged man, 10 of cups, Knight of swords, 6 of cups, page of cups, chariot,