This subreddit has always been encouraging and positive for me so I figured I'd post this here. I used to be a very devout Christian. Former pastor, did all the ministry things, ministry school, etc. I've known I was gay since I was probably late elementary school. For context, I'm 36 now, officially came out when I was 28 and am now married to my husband (been together since 2019). My family was always pretty outspoken against LGBT people growing up but they toned it down in front of me when I came out. None of them have ever really , explicitly voiced support for me or my marriage, nor have any of them ever made an effort to ask me questions, tried to understand me or where I'm coming from etc
I've had a slow falling out with my father (79) since about 2020. He and I do not see eye to eye on politics, etc. we had a pretty big argument a few weeks ago and I am just done with him and the rest of my family. I'll spare the details on the awful anti LGBT things my family members have said over the years, but suffice to say none of them have ever taken accountability for what they've said and done and they deny all of it, even tho it's vivid memory for me.
I'm just done trying to educate them. I'm done coddling them. I'm done being scolded and lectured when I voice my opinion or state my experiences.
After this last argument I had with my dad, my sisters have texted me trying to get me to "reconcile" with him. I'm not doing it. I just don't fucking care about them anymore. Theyve never been truly there for me, they've consistently voted against my rights and safety and then denied any responsibility for it.
They claim to be Christians but adhere to zero teachings of Jesus because holy fuck it's all liberal if you state it outside of a direct Bible quote.
I just won't fuck with Christians anymore. Traditional or progressive. They've done nothing but cause harm and then acted arrogant and holier -than-thou about shit.
Sorry if this is just super negative, I'm just feeling a fun combination of incredibly angry and incredibly hurt. I've tried so many times to educate and explain over the years and they just choose to be fucking stupid and ignorant about all of it.
Idk, encouragement I guess is appreciated, or just commiserating in my (insert whatever emotions are happening here). This just felt like a safe space to vent about this shit.