u/B3asy

I 33M need advice on how to handle this situation. My girlfriend (Sarah 28M) has had male best friend (Jeff 27M) for over 3 years. Sarah and I have been exclusive for a little less than a year. Sarah and Jeff have had a physical, non-exclusive, friends-with-benefits situation before Sarah and I met. Once Sarah and I became exclusive last year, she made an effort to create distance between her and Jeff, which involved reducing contact from texting all day every day, to texting once every 2-3 days. They have also stopped hanging out one-on-one. When they hang out about once a week, they are always in a group setting.

Sarah and Jeff have discussed reducing contact with each other and they are both on the same page about it.

The issue is, I'm still not comfortable with the fact that they are in contact with each other. Their emotional bond is stronger than the one I have with her. They essentially texted each other all day every day for two years and she has alluded to the fact that they have had great sex.

About two years ago, Jeff and Sarah discussed being in a serious relationship but they both agreed that they don't want that.

I have brought this concern up to Sarah multiple times and she constantly assures me that she is committed to our relationship but she does not want to fully cut Jeff out of her life.

I'm uncomfortable with the fact that they have a strong emotional bond and have had a physical relationship. In the back of my mind, I fear that she is keeping him around as a backup, in case her and I don't work out.

I don't want to be controlling and ask her to cut ties with him but at the same time, I feel very uncomfortable with the situation. What should I do?

TLDR: GF has a Best friend who was a FWB. They have made an effort to reduce contact, but I'm still not comfortable.