Struggling to keep the frame together after a rough night
I spent about forty minutes this morning just staring at my coffee mug trying to remember if I actually put the grounds in or if I was just brewing hot bean water. The four hour sleep cycle is starting to catch up with me. My kid is currently in a phase where he thinks 3 AM is the perfect time to practice his heavy metal screaming and honestly my patience is wearing thinner than my old gym t-shirts. It is easy to just sit on the couch and let the domestic grind swallow you whole but I know where that leads. If I do not move my body I start getting snappy with the wife and that is not the man I want to be for this family.
I managed to drag myself out to the garage for a quick session on the pull up bar while the little guy was finally napping. My back felt like a bag of dry kindling snapping and popping with every rep. Carrying a growing toddler on your shoulders or hip all day does a number on your posture that no one warns you about in the parenting books. You think you are fit until you have to lug a stroller up three flights of stairs while holding a diaper bag and a screaming human. That is the real functional strength test right there.
The hardest part is not even the physical exertion it is the mental shift. When you are exhausted your brain tells you to eat junk and scroll on your phone until you pass out. I had to fight the urge to finish off a box of crackers my son left on the table. Choosing the protein shake over the easy carbs feels like a small win in a day full of chaotic losses. I am not trying to win any trophies or look like a cover model anymore. I just want to have enough gas in the tank to play tag in the yard without feeling like my heart is going to exit my chest.
It is about that discipline of showing up even when you feel like a zombie. If I can survive a leg day on zero sleep I can definitely handle a grocery store meltdown. This whole dad thing is just one long endurance race and I am just trying to make sure I do not DNF before the first milestone. Just gotta keep the engine running even if it is making some weird noises lately. I probably should have checked if there was actually coffee in that mug though.