u/Away-Swimmer177

TW:Previous Loss, Living Children, TFMR

I’m 36. I will be 37 the end of June. I had my first living child, a daughter, in 2009. I then had a 6 week loss in November 2017. My living son was then born in November 2023.
I got pregnant again without even trying in April 2024. Unfortunately a cystic hygroma was discovered at our 13 week scan and NIPT came back high probability Trisomy 21. This diagnosis was later confirmed by CVS and we terminated at 16+5. It was the hardest decision I’ve ever had to make and I miss our baby so much.
Desperate to be pregnant again following the TFMR in August 2024 we started trying again right away and I conceived again in December 2024, a chemical unfortunately. We kept trying and not a single positive for 11 months. I saw my OB in September 2025 and he started me on Metformin. I conceived in October 2025 but sadly lost that pregnancy at 8 weeks in December. I had hormones checked, a SIS, and my partner had a SA. Everything has come back normal. Partner has 2% morphology but count and motility are excellent. He is also 28.
I had one cycle where I didn’t conceive since my miscarriage in December and my last 3 cycles I have conceived but all chemicals. I took Clomid last cycle to help me ovulate sooner, I ovulate on my own every cycle but later, CD20+. The Clomid did not help me to ovulate earlier, I still ovulated late on CD23 and conceived again but another chemical. So 3 chemicals, 3 cycles in a row this year already.
We have no fertility insurance so a RE is not possible for us at this time. My OB will not count the chemicals for RPL. I feel my age is the problem here and my egg quality is not good. I so desperately want this rainbow baby. My TFMR has taken such a toll on me and I feel I will never be okay without a healthy rainbow baby.
Has anyone had several losses in their late 30’s and gone on to have a healthy baby. Sometimes I feel like it is time to give up trying. I’m just kinda looking for hope here.
I’m on CD03 and will be starting Clomid round 2 today. Not feeling super optimistic though.
If you read all of this, thank you!

My TFMR was in August 2024. We lost our baby boy at 16W5D to Trisomy 21 and a Cystic Hygroma. We have been trying again since then and I’ve had 3 chemicals and a 8 week loss in that time as well as 11 months of infertility without a single positive. This journey has been brutal.

My OB started me on Clomid this cycle as I ovulate late, CD20+, in hopes it would help me ovulate sooner and possibly better. It did not, I still ovulated on CD23. I then started lightly spotting at 6DPO and I have been very lightly spotting since then. I took a test on 9DPO and it was stark white negative. I tested again on 10DPO and saw the faintest line, 11DPO the line got a little darker but only on wondflo early result, my easy at home test was negative. The spotting was super light as of yesterday, more like a faint pinkish/ tanish mucousy discharge. I probably wouldn’t even notice it if I wasn’t on such high alert from so many losses. Today I’m 12DPO and on Wondflo the line is getting darker though still light overall. I didn’t test with easy at home again today as it was negative yesterday. I still see the same discharge/spotting at times when I wipe but it’s very light.

I just feel so doom and gloom right now. I had the 8 week loss in December and I’ve had 2 chemicals this year already. The tests are getting darker which is great but the spotting since 6dpo has me thinking this is not going to work out. I messaged my OB and told him I got a positive but I’m spotting since 6dpo so I’m worried it’s a chemical but it’s the weekend and he takes forever to respond back so not sure when I’ll hear from him. I did take a Inito test yesterday and my PDG was almost a 10.

Has anyone had spotting like this and it worked out? I really need some hope right now.