u/Aware_Ad_3800

Me, 24F met my best friend 23M a little over a year ago on hinge. We dated for about a month where we kissed a couple of times but nothing more. After a while I realized that I was not particularly enjoying being intimate and told him that I was not having any romantic feelings for him. We stayed friends from then on and saw each other basically every week, charing our common interests and also calling each other while I was abroad for 2 months. We now live in cities approximately 3h away but still make time to see each other regularly. After we shortly dated last year he asked me again if I am really not interested like a month or so after I broke it of but that was it regarding those lines. I now realized that I really miss him when I am not seeing him and on general feel very drawn to him. I have never been in a relationship before, the closest was a situationship two years ago. I dont think I have ever been in love before and can't quite place my feelings. How / if even can I potentially test out what kind of emotion I feel towards him without also maybe hurting his feelings or loosing the friendship? I have had sex before which I enjoyed and I do know that I am also into men however I tend to be a bit closed of when it comes to intimate relations. Because of this I keep thinking that maybe I was just scared of letting someone so close and lost interest because of that fear? I dont know if I should do anything and if what since it also could just be very deep platonic feelings?