u/Aware-Stretch-8500

i'm in my twenties, grew up being punished by silent treatment, and that made me a huge people pleaser. i know it's not possible to not pick sides, because the moment you choose not to pick a side you are automatically on the side of the one who is problematic, or you lose both people. i know what's wrong with me and why i am so afraid of conflict and try to maintain peace, let's say i have my reality checked, any advice on a course of action that i can take to face conflict and not be an asshole?. and thank you very much for reading.