I don't know how to live with gender dysphoria
I only recently discovered I'm genderfluid, but I experience it in a very specific way. I spent my whole life living as a male without many doubts, even though I greatly appreciated everything about the female world and hated being a man. A friend pointed this out to me, and after a few months, I can confidently say that I am genderfluid.
Honestly, I feel a little guilty because it all seems to have happened so quickly; I feel as though I’m not respecting those who take years to reach this understanding. Another challenge is that on days when I feel more feminine, I really enjoy wearing makeup, but on more masculine days, I dislike seeing photos of myself with it on. I’m also trying to look more androgynous or gender-neutral by wearing neutral clothes and eliminating details that feel too masculine.
Throughout my life, I’ve always told everyone I was absolutely certain of my identity, and now that I’ve changed my mind, I feel like a fraud. I don’t know exactly how to handle it; sometimes it feels like a whim, and honestly, the people around me have been more accepting of it than I am of myself