I was seeing someone for a few months, but not really dating by standard means. We met for sex and I often went to his place after work or the gym. He always said I could freshen up at his place and we would have sex, cuddle, talk and I would go home. We would talk regularly and he wanted to hang outside of sex. He would tell me things out of the blue and I always felt like it was nice of him to just randomly tell me about his whereabouts because he never had to out of obligation. He got a new place and I went over to see it and we had a very good time and I stayed the night. I texted him when I got home and he said he enjoyed me over and I thought it we could spend more time together, but he ghosted me after I tried reaching out twice. I already knew what that means when someone doesn’t respond on two separate occasions.
I’ve been feeling very down about it. I know it was not a “relationship” and I know it’s a fwb type of ordeal, but it felt like it was more than that in some ways. Just me having a safe space with him, being in contact, and him just making me feel good really felt very good to me.
I don’t want to have myself become very emotionally distant from these type of situations. But it seems to me that they almost always end the same way whenever things start to go well, or I think. At times I just wish I could never desire companionship. I’d much rather be alone and not deal with anyone on that level ever again.